


drunken snowballs

by spinette_spyder



Category: Red Velvet (K-pop Band)
Genre: Crack, Cute, Drunken Shenanigans, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-23
Updated: 2021-01-23
Packaged: 2021-03-15 15:22:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,654
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28940664
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spinette_spyder/pseuds/spinette_spyder
Summary: featuring drunk boss seulgi and less drunk but still crackhead yeri
Relationships: Kang Seulgi/Kim Yerim | Yeri
Kudos: 5





	drunken snowballs

“Good evening.”

A young gentleman opened the gates of the fancy restaurant, ushering Yeri inside with a suave hand gesture.

The diner was huge, glowing in the rich atmosphere of Gregorian pillars, crystal chandeliers, and the esteemed guest list of celebrities and the elite class. Even if Yeri was nowhere close to being as influential as most guests, she did her best to blend in, wearing a blinding white silk dress that boosted her image in the most mature fashion. Her hair was delicately twisted into a braided bun with brown wispy tendrils of hair contouring her face. Despite her desperate attempts, however, the naive girl still stared in awe at everything she saw, eyes as wide as the gold-trimmed saucers underneath glasses of red wine. It didn’t take long for her to bump into someone.

“Hey, watch it!” The man was a photographer, a grumpy one that hollered, “You’re obstructing my view!”

"I am the view, sweetie," A tall faux-20s styled rich girl swept onto the scene, posing next to a velvet couch.

Yeri awkwardly waved back, still encapsulated in a daze over the items of luxury. Her curiosity moved a mile a minute, sporadically spotting interesting relics such as an exotic white tiger rug, a uselessly archaic rococo styled telephone, and the rarest prize of the showboat: Kang Seulgi.

“Yerim!” Seulgi ran over to her lover, hugging her while wearing an excellently tailored tuxedo, “I missed you so muchhhh…”

Yeri patted Seulgi’s back, still overwhelmed by her signature bear-hugs and the price tag on that suit of hers. The younger girl almost screamed, recalling an ancient battle in cry from their childhood whenever any of them showed any signs of being overly affectionate. Naturally, Yeri screamed more back then.

“I can’t believe you built this all up…” Yeri professed, “It’s a dream!”

“Nah, I wouldn’t call it a dream... unless you joined me for dinner tonight, baby,” Seulgi said, hand outstretched to escort her girlfriend.

“Yahhh!” Yeri said, slapping her wrist away, “That’s not cute!”

“Says the girl whose first kiss was with the cookie crumbs on my lips.”

“Come on, there was blue frosting too! How could I turn that down?”

“You proceeded not to wash your face for ten days after.”

“Hey! Don’t expose me in front of these capitalists like that- my rent’s gonna triple.”

“Girl, these businessmen don’t care about your gay ass.”

With intensive bickering, the duo finally found their way to their table decorated with elaborate flower setpieces and a special “YS” card just for them. It was a window seat, perfect for watching the little tufts of snow outside. As per usual, there was a collection of neatly organized silverware around every plate for specific purposes, but Yeri examined them as if they were creatures from a different dimension.

“May I get your order, mademoiselle?” A server materialized out of thin air, breaking Yeri’s focus on the foreign objects.

Seulgi spoke for her, “Yes, you may. Now can I get a Ratatouille with Gucci Chardonnay and a side of inheritance of King Louis XVI’s crown?”

Yeri blinked twice, kunfused. _What did she say?_ This rich people lingo did not vibe with her brain cells.

“I hope that means chicken tenders,” Yeri remarked.

“Um… no, but I think you’ll like it much more.”

The wait for appetizers wasn't long, with Yeri greedily gulping down bread rolls and butter squares. Seulgi only had the opportunity to eat two pieces, since Yeri kept stealing the butter from her and won every time they played a round of rock-paper-scissors for another delicious bite. By the time there were only crumbs in the basket, Seulgi was exhausted, blown out by Yeri’s competitive tactics for bread. Yeri blew a raspberry, flaunting her wins, “I got all the rolls! I got all the roll-”

"The main course, madames," Another waiter appeared out of nowhere, this time with a handlebar mustache and a thick ??? accent from rich man Narnia, “Enjoy!”

Yeri gasped, “I-I...There’s more food?”

Seulgi took a sip of red wine, wiped her mouth and said, “Relax, it’s not the end of the world! I was like that in 2099.”

“But, I’m not hungry anymore!”

The poor girl kept on trying to wash down her bread with wine, but only got dizzier and dizzier as the night wore on. She kept on picking at her delicious dish, at a loss as to why she couldn’t eat something so yummy and instead opted to drink like a forty year old alcoholic. Seulgi was no saint either, glugging down glasses in between giant munches of lobster. She was voraciously tearing into that thing, ditching the need for silverware as she clawed out the meat with her fingers.

“Don’t you feel bad for eating Sebastian?” Yeri asked, tipsy as hell.

Seulgi stopped in her tracks, reconsidering her life decisions.

"Seul-"

The owner of the restaurant jumped onto the table before kneeling into Yeri’s shrimp scampi. “In tribute to this poor lobster: I will now be singing one of the greatest masterpieces of our time.” She declared, catching the attention of the whole restaurant, “Now, who’s ready!”

Seulgi took a deep breath before singing, "UnDer the SeAa!!! uNdEr the sEaA!!!!"

Bam! The doors slammed shut. Yeri and Seulgi were now banned from the restaurant for life- or until Boss Bear started paying her poor employees more. The two of them were now stuck in the freezing winter landscape, hopelessly drunk (at least they had jackets). Yeri hiccuped, only a little less woozy than her girlfriend, "WaNna go to the playground?" A childish grin played with her lips.

"YeAHHH..." Seulgi wheezed, falling into Yeri's body, "Lesss go…"

"YAy!" Yeri said, tugging Seulgi's limp rag doll arm and pulling her to the playard as a little girl does with a parent.

They stumbled through the streets together, faces red with the forces of Asian glow and the arctic winds. It was like a glitchy video game in Yeri’s head; every time she wanted to go right, Seulgi went left and whenever Yeri gave up and just tried to follow, Seulgi would want to go in the direction they went before. Their legs were tangled in a knot of elegant party heels as they trudged through the snow, practically falling over top each other at every third step in the tundra they called NYC. It was so bitterly cold that Yeri even saw polar bears wandering the lands- or maybe she was too intoxicated.

Seulgi stopped at the fifth building over, knees giving out due to her sudden desire to become a mermaid. "I shall befriend the sea," she whispered, "I must connect myself with the fishies."

"There are more fishies in the snow, baby. Haven't you ever gone ice fishing?" Yeri reasoned, still determined to find the playground.

The older girl started crawling, unable to swim on the sidewalk.

"Now, let's cross the street!" Yeri said, looking both ways just like her teachers taught.

The only obstacle in the way was the photographer and fake flapper lady the young girl saw earlier eating each other in a parked limousine. It took a lot of willpower for her not to gawk, although Seulgi was already staring, walking across the road like a crab. "Is that what the fishies do?" She asked.

"Maybe. Now, let's go!"

After scissoring through some more buildings together, the two girls ended up in the playplace: a huge empty parking lot with mountains of snow piling up at the edges. Seulgi ran towards a certain snowhill, dreaming to fulfill her musical mermaid fantasies in the flurry of winter. She sat evenly on the ledge of the snow structure, warming up her vocal chords as she imagined the sea splashing in front of her. Despite the roaring winds, she tore off her coat ready to bless the world with her magnum opus. She would finally connect with the fishies.

"PaRt oF ThA-"

"Hey, Seulgi! Another waiter appeared out of nowhere and is looking for you!" Yeri yelled, right behind her on the hill, "I thought we wer- whoa!" The snow ledge cracked, unstable due to the pressure. In the tumble of snow, Yeri fell on top of the surprisingly soft Seulgi. Their eyes and hands locked, creating a bubble warmth for the two. Snowflakes fell, dotting Seulgi's cheeks as Yeri slowly picked them off and let them melt in between her fingers. The drunk bear chuckled, "That tickles~"

Yeri blushed, pink in the face, and said, "Well, um...uh-"

"Can we do like the fishies?" Her lover whispered, a puff of cold air emanating from her lips, "Please…"

"No. You're hammered!" Yeri stated, getting to her bearings.

"Pweasss…" Seulgi begged, tugging on to her legs.

"Fine, baby," Yeri kneeled down, took her girlfriend's hand, stroked it softly with her thumb, and gave it a tiny kiss, "You clumsy bear-" She said, patting her head.

"I'm cold." Seulgi sniffled a bit, sending cupid's arrows through Yeri's heart. It was moments like this one that she loved the most- the tender moments when Seulgi showed off her cute teddy bear side. Besides that, it also generated a bunch of fuel for her later roasts.

Butterflies erupted within the young girl as she put on the jacket she had discarded around Seulgi's strong shoulders, noting her girlfriend’s cute puppy eyes as she zipped it up. Yeri secretly cherished the time they had together, taking the opportunity to tenderly care for the rich businesswoman after all she had done for her.

"I love you," Seulgi cooed.

“Me too- wait- you’re not getting the last Advil pill.”

“I love, love, love you... you are part of my world”

“Shut up.”

“I have Advil!” the waiter said, popping up from nowhere.

"You too!" Yeri yelled, dragging her girlfriend to the limo. Even if this foolish girl embarrassed her to the ends of the Earth, she would still stay with her forever.


End file.
